I pulled this from my Tumblr account, originally posted there back in May. This… This is the story of my life. I choose unavailable men and attract… this kind of guy.
I can’t remember the last time I actually sat at my computer and wrote something in word. There was a time when that’s the only place I would write.
I go through phases where I do a lot of handwritten, um, writing. And my most recent writing phase has been, at best, sitting at the computer and spitting something out without rereading, proofing, whatever. Just —pew— then post.
But I opened Microsoft Word today, with the intention of sitting down to write.
And I found this, in the recovered document area.
He kissed me goodbye and walked toward his house and then pivoted and cupped his hands into a heart shape on his chest, over his own heart. Then, he extended his arms outward, still in the shape of a heart, and peered at me through this heart, then pressed it back into his own heart.
I nearly vomited in my car.
And if that wasn’t enough, after he did that, he just couldn’t take it anymore and ran back over to my car – I swear to god, he ran like a half child/half super fag – this giant of a man, flitting his arms as he pranced over to my driver’s side window and he shoved his entire upper body through my open window and, with both hands on either side of my face, kissed me. It was unnecessarily romantic for a lunch date.
I realized, as I drove away, that he had just killed my boner for him.
This is the story of my life. Men who are head over heels for me and me… Like… Totally grossed out by them.
The men that I actually do find myself interested in aren’t generally interested in me romantically. Even if they “adore” me, they don’t want to date me.
What gives Cupid?